Archive for February, 2010

All youth rugby is cancelled today (Sunday 28th February).

Tomorrow’s senior game at Douglas is cancelled due to waterlogged pitch.

The youth games scheduled for Sunday at KWC cannot take place as the pitches are water logged an unlikely to dry out before Sunday.

Too busy write anything this week except….

Doubters Proved Wrong…

…Doug actually is a man!  This startling revelation was proved beyond reasonable doubt when this week’s top news story finally hit the streets.
In the man’s own words:

“Lola Hope Hornby-Wheeler, saying ‘Hello World’.  Arrived at 09:11 on 25/02/2010 weighing 8lbs 7oz.  Delivered by c-section (slightly too much detail there Doug), mum, dad and daughter doing very well.”.

This was quickly followed by the additional revelation that father-hood makes you less Barrow-esque as evidenced by Doug’s follow-up text..

“Drinks in the Bay PE, Friday night from about 8”.

 If Dougie-boy’s buying, let’s not disappoint him with a poor show.  Party on!

But on a more serious note (there’s not a hope of Doug buying you all a pint),  on behalf of the committee, players, members and hangers-on, may I express our sincere congratulations to both Amy and Doug.  This is the best news we’ve had in 2010 and we look forward to seeing you all together as a family soon.  All the very best to the Hornby-Wheelers.  Aren’t they a cycling club in North Yorkshire?

Lenny is Dippy

A note from the mad man who organises other idiots to retract their testicles 4 times every New Year’s Day.  Put your coffee down before you read this as there’s a particularly chuckle-some goat related quip in the middle, and I don’t want you all burning yourselves.

“Quick polite reminder to all the hardy folk who not only bravely dipped on New Years Day but also did it for charity. It was Southern Dippers 9th year and the chosen charity is Rebecca House. Anyone wishing to donate still has a chance but we wish to wrap this up by Feb 20th please.
If easier please write cheques payable to Rebecca House and either drop them in to the Bay Port Erin or else mail them to me at:

Lenny Conroy
Primrose House
St Marys Road
Port Erin
IM96JJ

We will of course take whatever format you have collected in aside from Goats, sorry we don’t have any flexi-billy-ty with that!
We will have all monies collected and counted and make an announcement both via Club email and local press to set up a photo call for all those who have helped .Initial indications are we have £4k and likely will beat the best ever year we raised £4100. With over £20k raised in the last 9 years we would like to extend our thanks to all those helping in organising, putting on refreshments and particularly everyone who made the effort to get dressed up.Thanks also to main sponsor Pokerstars.com who have continued to back us.
Whilst my New Years Eve’s are generally ruined now and it appears I have created some sort of a monster, at least it’s all for a good cause.
Thanks again folks and see you there next year????

The final edit of the video can be found here:  http://www.youtube.com/triskel08

On behalf of Southern Dippers
Lenny”.

Have you stopped laughing yet?  Then read on.

Fixtures

According to the fixtures list, we have a Manx Cup Semi-Final on Saturday, but I don’t have the foggiest idea if that’s still the case.  The players will know what’s going on ‘cos they’ll all have been told at training on Wednesday.  Good luck regardless chaps.

On the Yoof front, and unless anyone knows differently, the games are as per the fixtures list on the website at: http://www.southernnomads.com/?page_id=121

Dates for the Diary

Check it all out at: http://www.southernnomads.com/?page_id=64

Got to get back to being over worked and under paid now, so that’s yer lot except to say, Committee Meeting on Monday night chaps.  I’ll take Amy’s 36 hours of guttural groans as an apology.

No Pay, No Play (final reminder)

We really, really, really want you all to play, but the players who have paid, cannot afford to subsidise those who haven’t.  Please make sure you see your Captain or the Treasurer immediately so that you, and the club, don’t miss out on our weekly dose of ‘champagne rugby’.

The prohibition comes into force this Saturday, so please get yourselves sorted before then if you still have a debt to pay.

As Spunky so eloquently put it on Sunday afternoon…”You’re club isn’t here to serve you, you’re here to serve your club”.  Not sure if he was speaking to the grass at his feet, or the bemused group of U14’s surrounding him, but the blank looks which ensued, most definitely did not convey ‘understanding’!

This Week’s Fixtures

It’s a crowd pleaser!

Nomads 1sts v Emerging Nomads in the Manx Shield. 

This will be 7-a-side tag format due to the economic climate and players financial constraints.  Only kidding, it’ll be a scrog-fest of gloriousness, with 30’odd finely tuned athletes displaying their not insignificant prowess.  Get down King Bill’s and feast your eyes on grass roots rugby at its very best.

Now’t fot yoof.  Played last week.

I didn’t get to see most of the games but was witness to a classic 1950’s style incident where a try was disallowed on the grounds of the little-known, Rule 26, Sub-Section 14, Paragraph c) -  “The ball was grounded in a girlie fashion”.  For the next match, we’ll be reviving another rarely used rule whereby the referee can impose 10 minutes in the sin-bin for any player “Approaching a conversion with foppish aplomb”.

Touchline Banter of the Week

Whilst standing on the sidelines after being substituted, one of our players (who shall remain nameless) was overheard having a bit of banter with the opposition.  The opposition scrum-half in question decided to rub-in the current match score situation with a snide, and frankly quite churlish shout of “Whats the score?”, to which our razor-sharp hero retorted with his rapier-like wit and repartee, “You’ve got very ginger hair….you look like Ronald Weasley”*.  They may have turned us over on the pitch, but in the all important “Irrelevant Comeback” stakes,  that’s one-nil to Nomads in my books.   Get in.

*Disclaimer #26 : The views of individuals expressed from the sidelines do not reflect the views of Southern Nomads rugby club or it’s committee, and discrimination on grounds of hair colour is not condoned in any shape or form by the club.  Indeed, quite the contrary.  We are very partial to the odd carrot-top and have gone as far as taking positive discriminatory action in this respect, as evidenced by our toleration of the less-than-attractive Martin ‘Ginge’ Jones as club Treasurer, and the laughable Ian “Ginger-Beard” Hargreaves as Club Captain.  What’s more, half the boilers we let go drinking with us after a game are either auburn, strawberry or ginger.  If that’s not an inclusive, PC attitude, I don’t know what is.

Website

The Website is being kept up to date and the weekly ‘No Dates’ are now being religiously posted on the ‘News’ page.  Any suggestions for what you’d like to see on there, drop me an email.  There’s no guarantee I won’t just junk your mail (in fact, if your name ends in ‘ock’, I guarantee I will)  but there’s no harm in asking…unless it’s a really stupid idea in which case I’ll ridicule you to within an inch of your life in next week’s email.

Remember to check the ‘Breaking News’ link regularly, ‘cos that’s where any late breaking news will be posted to let you know about any news which has broken late.

Tag Coaching

The first of the coaching courses are upon us and the Tag course is on Monday 22^nd February between 18:00-21:00 at Vagas’ clubhouse.  I believe that Gemma, Tom Guy and Stevie G are down as definite for this, so please complete your forms (available to download from the website) and get them sent off.  Parksy will get the fees sorted with Ginge and get back to you.  Defibrillator for the man with the fiery locks please.

Dates for the Diary

I really can’t be bothered typing them all out this week….you’ll have to do some surfin’ : http://www.southernnomads.com/?page_id=64.

No No Date next week ‘cos I’m off to watch Arsenal get their arses kicked by Porto.

See you all Saturday….and once you’ve coughed up your subs, cough up your tour deposit.

Date and Location for Tag Coaching Course published: details here: Tag Application

Contact Dave Parkes if you have any queries.

Well, my snotty snout seems to have dried up, so hopefully this week’s missive is a bit more intelligible than last week’s steaming heap.

Unfortunately, having already sent out the earlier evil-mail-of-doom, we’re not feeling too chipper, so we’ll just stick to the facts if that’s alright with you?

All Players and Members and Parents, please note…

A message from the lovely, yet very much sober and slightly spherical Amy Wheeler:

 “Hello everyone

Due to increased numbers at youth training and the clubs commitment to train the Southern Tag Team for the upcoming Manx Youth Games the club needs all playing (and social if possible) members to volunteer to help at 2 youth training or fixtures sessions before the end of the season.

What will I have to do?

Don’t worry – When you turn up to help you will not be given 20 kids and told to ‘coach’ them for an hour and a half and then left on your own! You will be there to help the existing coaches by setting up their activities, helping them with the organisation of the group, joining in and encouraging the players and of course passing on all of your extensive rugby knowledge and skills ( this part is not compulsory if you don’t have any!). It makes a big impression on the young players to have members of the senior teams there and they really enjoy training alongside you. Also you may actually pick up some tips yourself from the coach that you are working with!

When shall I turn up?

Attached you will find a table showing the dates for the youth training and fixtures, please can you choose the 2 sessions ( or more if you can ) that you can attend and then send the dates back to the Nomads email. Your name will then be put on the rota for those dates, the rota will be on the website if you need to check when you put your name down for.

The senior fixtures still to be played are also on the table so that you can check when would be easiest for you to help out. As youth training is finished by 1.00pm unless you are playing away in Ramsey there is plenty of time to get to the senior fixtures following helping out at the youth and both captains will accept it as a good and acceptable excuse for missing the first few minutes of warm up! If you don’t think that you could help before playing then volunteer to help at the Sunday fixtures instead!

Why should I bother to help?

It is really important for the future of the club that our youth system is working well and as many people as possible are involved even in a small way, we have just begun to see the benefits of having a good youth setup with the young players that are now playing with the senior teams and we want this to continue so that the club can become even more successful. It is also vital that we have a good youth system to ensure future funding from the RFU as it is based on this that they make a lot of their assessments.

Please get your preferred dates back to the Nomads email as soon as possible.  It’s mail@southernnomads.com if you’re in doubt.

Oh golly gosh, that was a big one.

Thank you

Nomads Youth Coaches and Committee”

This Week’s Games

Cheshire Plate 2^nd Leg: Southern Nomads 1sts at home v Ramsey 1sts.   I expect a 53-0 win boys.  Thirsty is praying for one!  If Welsh Mike can remember where his foot is, we might just do it.

Emerging Nomads are away to Ramsey 2nds in a friendly.  Do we do friendlies?  Thought not.  Stuff ‘em lads.

Yoof Rugby:

U7, U8, U9, U10, U11:  At Castletown

U12, U13: At Douglas

U14 & U15 who were due to play at Ramsey are now playing at 2:00 p.m. at Douglas.

Have a bangin’ time lads.  I’ll be in Douglas to give it large wiv yer.

Polite Reminder

No pay, no play.  Nuff said.

Dates for the Diary

•          February.  Tag coaching course.  Contact Parksy for details.

•          March. Rugby Ready Course.  Contact Parksy for details.  This is a pre-requisite for anyone wishing to do the Level 1 coaching course.

•          March 2010: Race Night – SPort Erin do.  You’re committed now so don’t be backing out.

•          Friday 30th April – Monday 3rd May 2010: Tour.  Malaga.  Approx £400/head.  See the Tour website page for up-to-date details and current tourist list.

•          May. Level 1 Coaching Course.  Contact Gaff for details.

•          29^th May. AGM.  Rowany Golf Club at 14:00.  This is your only chance to get rid of me.

•          18th July 2010: Soap Box Derby – SPort Erin do.  Mr Kelly already has road closure applications underway.  See Damo, that’s how you organise something

And to finish this week, a little gem from Monday’s committee meeting.  When reaching the point in the agenda where we get the Social Secretary’s report, our esteemed colleague TdC shuffled his paper work, cleared this throat, waited for silence and announced… “I’d just like to report… that I’ve probably got nothing to say”. Classic.

Oh, and the website is now being kept reasonably up to date and has a ‘Breaking News’ newsfeed to keep you up to date with all the latest goss and match news.  Hi-tech or what?

 The Y9/Y10 (U14/U15) games which were due to be held at Ramsey on Sunday, have been moved to Douglas.  KO 2:00 p.m.

Nomads official Response to Draft Southern Plan has been submitted and published on the website.